What happens when I'm not here?

My website is down. So yes, even though I just provided a link to it, it's probably best if you check back another day. If you do/did happen to check the link while the site is/was still down, there's a strange ego-enhancing message awaiting you. Ok, it may not enhance your ego! But for me - to see the words - "This site is unavailable because it is too busy" - well - that gives me a sense of pride, and yes, also a goodly amount of basic annoyance.

There are times when several days would pass without me realising that my site was down. It's not like I update it every day, so why would I look at it every day? I might never have known there was a problem. But today - yes today - I'm aware of it. And it's damned annoying! Just the fact that you can't see my profile photo while the site is down is annoying. This probably means I should upload a new photo. Let Blogger host it. One day I'll get round to that. Perhaps surprise you with a new photo.

There's not much to worry about. It's an ISP problem. It will be fixed soon, I'm sure. The engineers are "looking in to it". The site really isn't "too busy" (partly because no-one can get to it currently); although it does get its fair share of visitors, wondering what I have to say about my shaved head and lesbians on TV. I do monitor. I know what's popular.

So - in lieu of my site returning, here's a little download from my brain.

• Where does a website go when it's temporarily unavailable?


• Am I less me without my homepage?

2008: New Possibilities

Isn't that the great thing about January 1st? If we're inclined to think positively it can make us think even more positively. A new year, a new beginning. I'm pretty sure I need a new beginning with my blog because I seem to have neglected it for ages. I've never been that far away, although sometimes minds can travel extensively. Still, with all the talk of health consciousness which always follows possible excesses of the holiday season, I think it's important to remember that the mind also deserves a workout.

Here's a workout for the eye that I enjoyed over at AfterEllen.com: women who wear glasses are apparently getting hotter by the day. I'm happy to learn that lesbians have always known this. I updated my glasses in 2007. You can judge if they make me cool, hot, intelligent, sexy, accessible, geeky, or all of the above. None of these adjectives are mutually exclusive after all.

Find me at Womb Poetry

The summer/fall 2007 "Equinox" issue of Womb went live yesterday, and my multimedia visual, voice, and textual poem sequence Postcard Stream is published there.

Check out all the contributors and view my work by clicking on my name at Womb Poetry.



I'd love to hear your thoughts, impressions, comments. It's an interactive piece, so turn up your computer speakers and be prepared to move that mouse.

I say more about Postcard Stream here.

Stirring up the airwaves

An American adventure can quite change things. How do you like this outlook?

Gazing out to sea in Provincetown, Massachusetts:



Or this one?



That's right! You can now hear me in conversation with Merry Gangemi each week on Woman-Stirred Radio, offering commentaries on all things queer-shaped - mostly lesbian-shaped, I have to say - and mostly with a British spin. I'll also often be considering how our British and American cultures spin in and out of influencing each other.

Listen in each Thursday. Stream the whole show live 9pm-11pm in the UK (4pm-6pm Eastern US Time) from WGDR. There are always fantastic guests and great musical choices.

Actually, listen in next on 4th October. We're taking a break this week, but we'll be back!

My not-so-hidden adventures

Did I forget to tell you more about my American adventures? I think I did. Well, there are plenty of photos over at the Woman-Stirred August 2007 archives.

You can also find videos of Julie R. Enszer and Merry Gangemi reading at Tea & Poetry in the September 2007 archives. I have to say that because here we are in the final week of September already, and soon September will slip away because the nights are drawing in, and ... ok, ok, enough of that!

Poetry Pleasures

Here is some of what I got up to on my recent visit to the US: reading at the Tea & Poetry event in East Hardwick, Vermont. That's Merry Gangemi giving me a warm welcome. We were to read in the garden at Perennial Pleasures, but it was cold outside that particular afternoon.

The whole trip was fantastic.

I'm treating this piece of video as a test. I hope more will follow, as well as more detail of my adventures.

Travels of a Queer Poet

Yes - that's me! I'm here, I'm queer, and I'm travelling to the States to read poetry and meet two of my Woman-Stirred friends in person for the very first time. I'm sure you've heard me talk about them before! So that really means I'm not here at all. In fact I'm over there - being queer, and friendly, and a poet. Or at least I will be very soon. If you see what I mean.

Here's what's going on. If you're in the Vermont vicinity, please come along and support us. I'm the one with the English accent.


BLACK SHEEP BOOKS presents:

Three Queer Poets:
Readings by Julie R. Enszer, Merry Gangemi, and Nicki Hastie

Tuesday, August 14 at 7:00 p.m.
at 4 Langdon Street, Montpelier, VT

Julie R. Enszer, a Maryland-based writer and lesbian activist, is published in "Iris: A Journal about Women," "Room of One's Own," "Long Shot," the "Jewish Women's Literary Annual," and the "Harrington Lesbian Literary Quarterly." Her book, "Homesteading: Essays on Life, Death, Sex, and Liberation," is forthcoming in winter 2008. For more on Julie, see http://www.JulieREnszer.com.

Merry Gangemi lives in Woodbury, VT, and is the host of Woman-Stirred Radio, a weekly queer cultural journal on WGDR 91.1 fm. Her work is published in the "Paterson Literary Review," "Journal of NJ Poets," "Harrington Lesbian Fiction Quarterly," the "Harrington Lesbian Literary Review," "Vermont Woman," and the "Hardwick Gazette." She produces the annual Tea & Poetry series, a Vermont literary festival now in its sixth year. For more on Merry, see http://www.merrygangemi.org.

Nicki Hastie lives in Nottingham, England. She is a founding member of the Woman-Stirred blog. Her work is published in "Chroma," "Diva," "Trouble & Strife," and also in critical anthologies relating to women's health, coming out stories, lesbian fiction, and representations of lesbians in popular culture. For more on Nicki, see http://www.nickihastie.demon.co.uk.

* * *

Black Sheep Books, a community space and bookstore in Montpelier, Vermont, offers affordable radical and scholarly books, and hosts educational events on cultural and political topics. As an all-volunteer project, we are operated by a five-member collective hand in hand with a group of dedicated volunteers. Our principle focus is to provide access to anti-authoritarian Left ideas in a way that promotes intellectual debate and challenges today’s hegemonic culture. Together with horizontalist social movements and political projects, bookstores, infoshops, and publishers, Black Sheep Books works toward an egalitarian, ecological, and nonhierarchical society.

Black Sheep Books
4 Langdon Street, Montpelier, Vermont
www.blacksheepbooks.org / 802-225-8906
Hours: Tues-Sat 11-6, Sun 11-5, Mon closed



And then, on Saturday 18 August, what better than Tea and Poetry?

You really won't want to miss us in the gardens of Perennial Pleasures for this Vermont literary festival, now in its sixth year thanks to the organisational skills and poetic-mindedness of Merry Gangemi. Voluntary donations benefit the AFSC VT office youth outreach and education program.

Readings are at 1pm and 3pm on both Saturday and Sunday. Julie, Merry, and I will be reading on Saturday at 3pm. Don't forget to bring a lawn chair!

Ellen is not alone

I'd already come out a decade before, and none of us ever thought Ellen was alone in discovering her sexuality, but sometimes you've got to run with the times and make things so much more obvious. So I bought the t-shirt in 1997, the year when Ellen came out, declaring just that: "Ellen is not alone", and I wore it to work as a statement. Not that I was coming out too, because like I said, I was already out. But not everyone chooses to recognise these things, even when it's obvious. And yes - we deserve recognition!

So, it's kind of cool that I should now resemble Ellen in this quiz.

What famous lesbian do you most closely resemble? My Result: Ellen Degeneres   You're quick-witted, smart, savvy and you have a killer sense of humor. You are an active member of the Lesbian community and the only closet you're in is the one with all your clothes.
Melissa Ethridge
Katherine Moennig
Rosie O'Donnell
Tammy Lynn Michaels
K D Lang
Portia Di Rossi
Jackie Warner
What famous lesbian do you most closely resemble? Make a Quiz

Coming out. Closet. Clothes. Did you notice how I managed to reference them all in my opening paragraph? Not just a clothes horse, me. Oh no! As for that killer sense of humour ... well ... I rest my case.

Books are for life

I started cataloguing my book collection once. My lesbian-themed book collection, that is. At the time I started doing this (1993) it was probably seen as a particularly nerdy thing to do, especially using bibliographical software. That did take a certain amount of commitment, and I abandoned the project a few years later. But nothing will dispel my belief that lesbians and libraries really go together very well!

Now, with the help of the latest online tools, it's so much easier for everyone to be a would-be librarian. So I'm trying out LibraryThing, and you can see my most recently acquired books by scrolling down the page and checking out the righthand margin of this blog.

Congratulations to Julie R. Enszer who has two poems published in Queer Collection: Prose & Poetry 2007, and very kindly sent me a copy. This anthology is well worth a read, and the editor is already on the lookout for submissions for the 2008 collection.

Window seat in standard class

I was in London today. Getting there by train, I had these thoughts.

Not Blue

The pen is black.
If blue I might
have needed to stop
in order to decide
whether to continue.
I could have been
wrongly poised,
paper averse.
For now,
the day is saved.


London-bound

Windows are for looking out and through,
but harsh train lights present my twin,
hovering over opposite tracks.
It's impossible not to see -
half-turned in acknowledgement -
dark circles under eyes,
pores like newsprint dots.
I would not choose this early start.
Beyond me sheep have woken to rain,
resisting dampness beneath railroad arches.
Creatures waiting to emerge from shadows.


Turn-Ups

Yesterday I caught a leaf
in my trouser turn-up.
Was it there all afternoon?
Or did it drop later with the rain?
Carried home in a thoughtful haze,
showing me how to attend to the world.
I scooped it out, a yellow veined disc,
embarrassed what else might have
been not-quite-concealed as we talked.
Crumbs from my lunchtime sandwich?
A crisp from the lunchtime before?
Once I found a paperclip.
I think I can be forgiven one small leaf.
Leaves will fall where they please.